Fat Athletes

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Comment by Kathy Barron on October 1, 2009 at 1:08pm

Nina -- exactly! That is my favorite thing to do -- float naked under the stars. There are all kinds of nudist resorts all over the world. You can find some of them at http://aanr.com/. Glad you got your Y membership. Hope you enjoy it!

Comment by Nina on September 30, 2009 at 6:17pm

Well I did go get my Y membership. And I got a good look at the locker room area, which definitely doesn't have private places to change.

@Kathy: I am glad to hear your PF is improving, and I appreciate your suggestion about seeing this as a chance to celebrate my body-- in theory! It's just that my practical experience in locker rooms is one of mixed anxiety and fury. When I was a kid I wasn't modest in locker rooms or in plenty of other circumstances, but around the time I was 18 I became only barely able to stand strangers coming close to me or brushing against me when I'm fully dressed. I don't even really know why--obviously it sounds like a headcase thing but no antidepressants ever lessened it. So I'm even less eager to have people in my space when I'm nekkid. I am going to try anyway and see if I can make it work through a combination of going during slow times, desensitizing myself, and also probably glaring around a lot to protect my "buffer zone."

Re: the nudism--does that mean you get to go naked swimming outdoors? That is my absolute favorite, but sadly I no longer have any idea where I would go for that. It is perfect to be fat too because you can float on your back and watch the stars with total relaxation.

Comment by Kathy Barron on September 30, 2009 at 4:34am

Hey Nina ~ I've been loving swimming lately too. (And I've also struggled with plantar fascitis, which is finally getting better after over a year of bodywork -- for me, it was a result of a misalignment of the pelvis). Re: changing into/out of your swimsuit -- maybe you could look at is as good practice regarding not just being protective of your body -- but of even more deeply accepting/celebrating/claiming your body -- and claiming space for yourself in this world. I change at my fitness center. I also go nude into the steam room and the jacuzzi (which are both in the women's locker room). Of course, I am a nudist too -- so that makes it easier for me. But becoming a nudist was the BEST thing I ever did for myself. And perhaps claiming your space to at least change without apology for your body (or feeling threatened by others looking at you) will be a great thing for you. I don't mean to make it sound like you don't accept and love your body -- I hope it doesn't come off that way. I don't know your relationship with your body -- but it does sound a little like you are expecting to be attacked in some way (so you need to be protective)? For me, if someone doesn't like how I look, they can look away. I am here to live MY life fully -- and I won't let other people's opinions hold me back. Good luck!

Comment by Nina on September 29, 2009 at 5:22pm

I am just getting re-started finding some movement to keep my body sane. I can't walk like I like to now that I have plantar fascitis so I'm looking around for other things to do. With great trepidation I am contemplating signing up for a membership at the downtown Y in Berkeley and using their pool. The trepidation is mainly because I am very protective of my body and don't want to change in front of strangers, yet also don't want to turn my car into a marsh from driving home home in a swimsuit. At this moment, thinking about it, I am like a kid teetering on a diving board...

Comment by Vivienne on September 21, 2009 at 12:42pm

Kathy and Elizabeth, I loerve your comments and thoughts! I cannot tell you how much you and this network has increased my awareness of myself! Thank you and a thousand blessings!

Comment by Kathy Barron on September 19, 2009 at 2:40pm

The way I feel about it, is that I appreciate anything that my body can do, whether it is more or less than I used to be able to do. For example, I used to be able to run really fast ... and I can't do that now. But I appreciate that I can walk really well now (a huge improvement over my painful, limping walk of a year ago). I try not to compare myself to my prior self or to others -- but to feel the joy in movement, in strength, in sensation ... even in something like floating. Because of my fatness, I am a GREAT floater! And I love that about my body. I can totally appreciate feeling good about feeling stronger. It is a result that feels empowering. And I can totally appreciate the softness of someone who isn't as strong. It's ALL good!

Comment by Elizabeth Gall on September 19, 2009 at 9:25am

One thing I'm really liking about rowing is feeling how much stronger I'm getting, and feeling/watching muscles develop that I didn't have before. I'm not quite sure how to feel about the vanity (I think that's the best word for it). I didn't set out rowing to change my body, but I feel it would be wrong not to appreciate the changes I'm seeing. At the same time, however, I feel like patting myself on the back for weight loss is rewarding the wrong thing - the fact that I'm stronger, have more endurance, and have the commitment to do some kind of physical activity (intensity varying, of course) almost every day of the week. I try and deflect some of that into appreciating the strength/muscles I'm building, not anything I'm 'getting rid' of, but it still feels kinda... vain.

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Comment by Sue Widemark on September 19, 2009 at 5:04am

Kathy, I watched your video "headless fattie" - that was absolutely great! I have always been athletic also but age has kind of sidelined me. Can do non impact stuff and with a bit of pain, a Richard Simmons video (Sweatin' II) once a week but have to sit on stability ball during the weight training part. I find I have to exercise the core at least every other day or my back starts spasming. Used to get a lot of injury when I was larger. Now don't get the injury... just OLD muscles... ** sigh ** I know some folks my age are still out there dancing. oh well...

Comment by Kathy Barron on September 19, 2009 at 4:14am

Hi Vivienne! Sorry about your internet troubles ... I know how aggravating that can be! Ugh! Hope it gets better soon!

I've always been athletic and loved sports. My very favorite thing as a kid was new tennis shoes -- I would even wear them to bed, I'd be so excited about them. LOL I felt like I could fly! :)) It's been a little hard on me emotionally being injured -- and unable to do so many of the things that I used to do easily (like walking). I don't know if I'll be able to ever run again -- and participate in tennis, which is one of my favorite things. I've had huge improvements in my pelvic alignment and my feet and knees -- but I'm a long ways away still from being able to run. I hold hope! Right now, I'm just grateful to be able to be walking better. I look forward to walking with no pain! I've come so far in that area that I do believe I can get there.

I totally get what you mean about how HOW you go about it makes a big difference. I agree! If I were doing *anything* that I do just for the sake of exercise ... yawn, complete boredom! Yuck! I wouldn't do it. I love being outside and feeling my body moving. I love being in nature -- one of the reasons that I love golf so much -- it's very meditative for me -- and golf courses are nearly always just beautiful! The reason that I love the elliptical trainer is it lets me have the feeling of running without the jarring of my knees -- I do love the feeling of running. It is a body joy -- don't know how to explain it other than that. And my new fitness center, the trainer looks over a gorgeous pool -- it is very soothing. Put on some music and I'm flying like a kid again! LOL

For me, it's really, really important with "exercise" that I feel like I'm appreciating and feeling my body -- NOT that I'm trying to change my body in any way. Maybe I'm trying to get my legs a little stronger so that my knees are more stable -- but I'm not trying to lose weight or reshape my body at all. I am appreciating the strength and beauty and (occasional) grace of my body right now. There is no negativity or body judgment happening. That is an important attitude shift that's happened for me over the last decade or so. It's an important part of my sanity patrol in regards to exercise and movement.

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