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Lynn Ellen

Aging in our Fat Bodies

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Aging in our Fat Bodies

an oppotunity to talk about our experiences with aging as fat people, sorting out our particular challenges, complaining and celebrating and drawing on existing resources for aging folk. (the offsite website isn't fully up yet, but will be.)

Website: http://aginginourfatbodies.com
Members: 18
Latest Activity: Dec 7

Discussion Forum

Pattie Thomas, Ph.D.

Menopause 14 Replies

Started by Pattie Thomas, Ph.D.. Last reply by Vivienne Oct 29.

Lynn Ellen

Is it Fat or is it Aging? 6 Replies

Started by Lynn Ellen. Last reply by Lynn Ellen Sep 9.

Lynn Ellen

Generating a list of topics 11 Replies

Started by Lynn Ellen. Last reply by biggirl May 11.

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Sue Widemark Comment by Sue Widemark on December 7, 2009 at 4:39am
I think you are on the right track... there is a large body of evidence that happiness does NOT increase directly with - what our society THINKS brings happiness - i.e. wealth, beauty or fame. On the contrary!

When I was 18, Marilyn Monroe committed suicide. Now in retrospect, there are some who think her death may have been homicide. But even so, this really does not change things because this woman who typified all that Americans hold dear i.e. beauty, wealth, youth and fame, had been so clinically depressed in her last year of life that she often walked off the set of the movie she was making and she liberally medicated herself with not only alcohol but drugs also.

In observing this and other famous suicides and/or clinical depressions, I decided right then and there that those things - beauty, fame and wealth - were what I was not going to waste my life seeking after. And so I have lived out my life like that and at the age of 65, have absolutely no regrets whatsoever.... :)
Vivienne Comment by Vivienne on December 6, 2009 at 6:34am
BTW, I am doing some reading on the research on "happiness" and there is evidence that people become happier as they age, peaking around age 65 and leveling off between age 65 and 75.
Vivienne Comment by Vivienne on December 5, 2009 at 12:53pm
I have been inordinately happy lately--just thought I would throw that into the mix. No idea why. Some cool things. My husband is turning 60 and I just turned 58. We are kinda nerdy and fat and ... yet, we have very attractive cool younger friends who are wonderful people and seem to find us fun and interesting. Is that awesome or what? I mentioned before, that we sometimes have to do things like go out clubbing and dancing with our 21 year old daughter--and people are very sweet to me and dance with me. I am evidently old enough now that people think I am cute. I thought that would be insulting but, hey, if it gets people dancing with me, who cares, right? I feel like hell physically but still feel good emotionally. so, how are y'all????
Sue Widemark Comment by Sue Widemark on November 22, 2009 at 1:50pm
Yeah I'm pretty used to my "soft" dinners.... I guess it's good to laugh! :)
Vivienne Comment by Vivienne on November 7, 2009 at 9:48am
At least we are laughing :>)

I do become panic stricken when I cannot think of something and I need to just breathe deeply and visualize--see, I could not think of the work "visualize" but it came to me when I relaxed!

Sue, I used to grind up pot roast and every thing else for baby food for my daughter. My m-in-l makes chicken and beef broth and freezes it in ice cube trays, then dumps the little cubes into baggies and adds the broth to whatever veggie or whatever else she's eating.

My husband bought a really powerful blender used on the internet (Vitamax--something like that). They are very expensive--but very cheap on the internet.

I don't know if you can eat dairy, but my daughter makes a lot of smoothies and we add spinach to them--a LOT of nutrition.

There are a couple of cook books out about "hiding" veggies in food for children that have ideas that I have used for reducing the calories in foods. I have added a cup of green beans to a cup of chili, for example--they hardly change the taste at all. It could all be blenderized. I LOVE spinach and would be happy to blend it into anything but cheesecake :>)

I need to eat somewhat softer food, too, because of headaches and general head/neck pain--just avoid steak, etc.

Also, pasteurized eggs are available now so we add raw eggs to smoothies.

I am soooo grateful for my blessings--the greatest of which is that I am laughing my butt off!
Sue Widemark Comment by Sue Widemark on November 7, 2009 at 2:30am
Interesting about using verbs... for Passwords... have to think about that one. I just read Snowdon's book about the Nun's Study ... very interesting.. glad you are feeling better.
Vivienne Comment by Vivienne on November 6, 2009 at 6:29pm
OK, I'm better--I am literally laughing out loud. You peed yourself. I peed in my car at 70 mph on the interstate. I knew it was just a matter of time. I was following my husband to return a rental car. Even if I had known where to get off to find a restroom, my husband is so easily discombobulated, I might never have seen him again! I had 2 pairs of underwear in my purse and was wearing a pad. So, while driving--I am still a fantastic driver!--I stuffed this all down the front of my pants and soaked everything. LOL Then, pulled it out and threw it on the, mercifully plastic and not carpeted, padded thingy on the right front passenger side which I cannot think of the name of right now. OMG! I am going to pee myself again right now, I am laughing so hard! I am never able to remember any of my doctor's names but I think that is psychological as I have never been able to remember their names--even when I was young. I can remember verbs better than nouns so I have started using verbs as my passwords! Very clever, n'est pas. BTW, one day I could remember "cote d'azure" but could not remember "French Riviera!" I am wondering if there is a "reverse dictionary" where you write the definition and get the word!?! I was at a party once, right after reading the nun Altzheimer's study when it was in Newsweek and this man is telling me about his research and it sounds very familiar and I ask if I have met him before...and...if was one of the researchers in that study! Way cool! Well, we will just all laugh til we cry or pee--whichever comes first! or both!
Sue Widemark Comment by Sue Widemark on October 30, 2009 at 3:33am
By the way, I of course, couldn't remember the name of the guy whose video I wanted to share so I had to look it up on Google. Took a couple of tries but "no arms no legs" worked... :)
Sue Widemark Comment by Sue Widemark on October 30, 2009 at 3:32am
It's not fat related. It's age related.

I just peed myself... husband said something funny and I had been drinking water because my effing guts don't work well anymore so I have to slurge water to defecate at least once a day... he said something funny and I guess I'd waited too long and I leaked (which I usually do but wear Serenity pads and the "heavy ones" at night) and I peed through all over in getting to the bathroom... I couldn't seem to hold it once it started coming. So he helped me clean up (he's a nice guy) and we together disinfected the bathroom and I disinfected the toilet (I peed all over that too) - that was after I jumped into the tub and the shower at 2 am in the morning.

As far as hurting all over, I've had arthritis since I was nine years old but of course now, it's REALLY fun and especially as I had a stroke last year which took out part of my left leg so I cannot walk far (have a scooter) and have to use to cane - trying to rehab it but it will probably take longer to rehab it than to my probable next stroke. The doctor commented:

you have clogged blood vessels in your brain

Oh joy. I lost part of my memory with that stroke and so I also cannot remember names of things I should be remembering. I use the computer a lot to look up things.

The other day when I needed a tooth pulled, I couldn't remember the name of our dentist and had to ask my husband. So far (although HE had a hemorrhagic stroke last year and lost some memory) his memory doesn't fail at the same time mine does. Or if it does, we have our computers. Google can find anything. Passwords.... I got them all stored in the computer and Mozilla "remembers" passwords so I can look them up there also. Lots of people even with normal memories cannot remember passwords.

I write EVERYTHING down. I have notebooks, a laptop, a palm pilot and so forth.

I lost 90 lbs but it didn't do a thing for the pain of moving. And I get around worse now due to the stroke than I did, 90 lbs ago. Much worse! The joke's on me right? I lost 90 lbs because I went on a program for GERD - that was because I got sick of being awoken every night, with a throatful of stomach acid, some of which I would breath (that's so not fun).

Doesn't matter because I have difficulty swallowing so my Magic Bullet is my best friend - most of what I eat is either very soft or adult baby food. Most lean cuisine dinners grind up good. I also have lost most of my teeth due to a congenital B12 deficiency. No teeth and an inability to swallow are not a good combination. Trust me in this. But cake goes down wonderfully but with my crummy genetics, I have to watch what I eat because if I didn't I'd be extremely large - my body temperature is 1.5 degrees low and that totally zaps ones metabolism. I managed to get up to 267 lbs just eating around 2000 calories a day and still restricting sweets.... so you can imagine...

If you are panicky, then you really cannot remember - no one can when they are upset even if they DON'T have memory problems.

But it doesn't only happen to us.... My DIL lost a car (and they found it three months later, right where she parked it). It was an Ultima too and of course the insurance (they thought it was stolen) paid them a fraction of what it was worth so they never replaced it. She's in her early 40's. We tend to exaggerate our problems. It doesn't happen to everyone but it happens to many people.

They say Alzheimers is caused by tangles in the brain and the actual shrinking of the brain in size, but in the nuns study (David Snowdon) they found that one of the sharpest 90 year olds who passed all the memory tests and showed no signs of senility at all, had one of the smallest brains and it had A LOT of tangles in it. So much for their theories... back to square one.

There is some evidence that cardio exercise (and you can do it even if you have mobility problems - trust me in this) and doing something daily, with your brain like puzzles or writing memoires or something, helps to stave off senility. Also vitamin supplements might help and a healthy diet - milk etc. Things like fast food, alcohol and smoking do NOT help. On the contrary.

I told you about what I face at 65 years old (I wear pads - serenities all the time - have to ... leak from both ends and yes, I've pooped and not made it also) because the bottom line is we have what we are given. Some get more, some get less but one has to do the best with what one has... being on the pity pot just makes us miserable and doesn't help the situation.

Next time you want to think you don't have anything or are losing everything, go watch this guy in his 20's who has lived with untold disabilities since day one. Kind of puts things in prospective. I find him very good for reminding me that life could be worse... :)

No arms no legs no worries
Vivienne Comment by Vivienne on October 29, 2009 at 4:55pm
I don't think this is related to fat at all but to aging or meds.

I think I have altzheimers." Everyone keeps saying, "Don't worry, I cannot remember anything, either." I cannot tell my daughter where I am. I cannot look it up in the phone book. I cannot call the office--because I cannot remember the freakin name I of a condo I own. I can drive to it from the airport--or from else, for that matter, but, I cannot think of the NAME of it! I don't know WHERE I am! I could not think of the word "rug" the other day. I cannot remember my friends' names. Neither my husband nor I can remember our passwords--and guess what?

Baby boomers are aging by the minute and NO companies have any single plans for what they are going to do with us all when we cannot remember a damn thing.

I am panic stricken.

If you cannot remember your pass words, tough luck--actually their tough luck when I don't pay them because I don't remember I owe them :>)

MY husband went to the grocery HOURS ago and has not returned and I cannot call him because he CANNOT REMEMBER TO TAKE HIS CELL PHONE. He cannot remember where his cell phone is. And, when it rings, he just looks around vacantly as though he wonders what that ringing is!

OK, this is not the place for this but I don't have a place for it.

AND, I haven't even addressed why am I stiff and sore every damn day of my life?

I'm sorry people. I don't have any other place to say this. You can ignore me.
 

Members (18)

Lynn Ellen Vivienne Pattie Thomas, Ph.D. Susan Koppelman Stef Maruch Sue Widemark biggirl Krissy D EssaAdams Lara Frater Eileen Serene Vannoy PixieKat Mary Ray Worley Cynth Patsy Nevins Nomi Dekel William
 
 

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